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Mar. 21st, 2010


So, I was jsut sitting here being bored since I was econ'd tonight and WOW. I can't believe I forgot about this thing! I thought I had deleted it when it crossed my mind, but apparently not! Im so happy to have found it! So many awesome memories (lots I shake my head at now) but so much of my best memories in there with my closest friends! Although Im slightly appauled at how immature I was! I had no idea I was so foul mouthed! LOL

Would like to point out just for the record that I talked alot about my happy married life. It was the complete opposite. I lied to myself. I knew the truth but I continued to lie to myself. I made up most of the things I said about that whole situation..I put on a front..for everyone. I was miserable! Now that thats out of the way.... :)

I don't remember exactly what the last post was about...I think my gallbladder. I've gone back to earlier posts since that one so I have forgotten but life has changed DRASTICALLY over the last year or so. Lets see, a second childs birth, a divorce, falling in love, an engagement, a third pregnancy, and all the in-betweens and all the up in the airs and unknowns that are still being worked out.

So, we have Logan and Kaitlyn. Two of the worlds cutest children. They are my babys and I love them oh-so-much. I am so lucky to have been blessed with them even through the unhappy circumstances in which they were brought into. I promise for their sake to never be so selfish again.

And we have the love of my life (no lying this time :)) Someone that I cannot wait to share the rest of my life with. TJ...the first man (at the time a teenager..lol) to have ever treated me like a lady no matter how crappy I treated him at the lovely age of 15 where life revolves around yourself. Somehow, fate has allowed us to be together (the way it always should have been). With love, came an engagement. Words cannot describe the way he makes me feel and I can't even begin to try to because Im pregnant and severely emotional today and trying to find the words would just make me incoherent so I will save that for when I don't feel like I could cry at the drop of a dime.

Which leads me to talk about the third pregnancy. A child who was made out of the love that tops any kind of love out there. How amazing. And thats all I will say about that because like I said, Im a pregnant hormonal lady (who should probably be sleeping.)

All the in-between are still TBA's at this point. I don't know what the future will hold (I know I sometimes claim to be psychic, but TJ will vouche for me...Im a horrible one) but DO know that with my children and my (soon to be) husband, everything will be just the way intended for my life :)

Im not really sure If and how often I will continue with this live journal but it seems like such a waste to just let all these memories get lost in cyber world! We will see how I feel in the morning.

Mar. 12th, 2008

Grown up...

My blog has grown up and moved.....


that is if anyone wants to "holler"

Aug. 10th, 2007

Logan and his new cousin

Aug. 7th, 2007



Jul. 21st, 2007


I feel so bad right now...had my gallbladder removed yesterday and i hurt so bad. And I cant even hold/cuddle/breastfeed Logan. He stayed with my mom from 2 AM till 7 PM yesterday and I missed him so much and now that I have him back again i cant even get close to him...im not even suppose to be picking him up but try telling that to a newborn. Im so sad...i just want to cuddle and be able to feed him. Now, when he wants fed I have to get him a bottle and make his daddy give it to him..when he cries, daddy gets to hold him...i guess im just feeling left out. I also am hoping Logan doesnt think im trying to abandon him...im not! Im sad :0( I want to hold my baby :0(

Jul. 8th, 2007


He's here!! 6 lbs 5 oz...20 inches long...born 6/22 at 3:29 PM...

No, i didnt get an epidural

and Yes, it freakin hurt like hell!!


Jun. 21st, 2007


Tomorrow is the day my son will be born :0)

Jun. 9th, 2007


Well, im being induced on June 22nd because of my gallbladder. I told them I didn't want to go into labor again...yes again...with a gallstone attack. About a month ago I was in the hospital for 4 days in preterm labor on all types of meds and steroids because i had a gallbladder attack which put my body in distress and the baby tried to come early! It was a horrible experience and the meds they gave me made me feel near death! Anyways, so they are inducing me so im not stuck with the pain of another gallbladder attack on top of labor. Im so so super excited that I can hardly stand it! Less then 2 weeks!

May. 6th, 2007


Almost 32 weeks....baby is almost here!! At the doctors Im already dialated 1 cm and im 70% effaced. Baby is still high at a -2 station so thats good! He's getting so darn big in there!

Mar. 28th, 2007


Bloomin onions are the devil and will have you admitted into the hospital for pancreaitis if your gallbladder doesnt work correctly. Stay away!

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